Wobbly Meter
- Note: This article is a parody on the meter's Wikipedia page and is created to define the unit of measurement that is used to measure length in Totally Accurate Battle Simulator. It is not canon nor acknowledged by Landfall; please do not take this page too seriously.
The Wobbly Meter (American spelling) or the Wobbly Metre (Commonwealth spelling) (from the French unit boncàle mètre, from the Greek noun αναστατωμένος μέτρον, "measure", and cognate with Sanskrit mita, meaning "measured") is the base unit of length in the Totally Accurate System of Measurements (TASM). The TASM unit symbol is WM.
The Wobbly Meter is currently defined as the length of half a dead Wobbler of average size lying on the ground, equivalent to two squares on the grid of the Simulation map as shown on the visual presentation.
The Wobbly Meter was originally defined in 1793 as one to a hundredth of the distance from the ground to the peak of the highest tree at Tribal 1. This definition was quickly dropped however when Mammoths began nesting on the tree, making measurements difficult and dangerous. In 1799, the Wobbly Meter was reintroduced in terms of the Monkey King Staff, (the actual staff used was changed in 1889 as Wobblers noticed the Wobbly Meter was exponentially longer than it was 90 years ago). In 1960, the Wobbly Meter was redefined in terms of a certain number of fine marble tiles of a certain spot of Renaissance. The previous definition was adopted in 1983 and modified slightly in 2002 to clarify that the Wobbly Meter is a measure of proper length.